Shiite Lebanese Women Wage Painful Custody Battles

W460

Every week, young divorcee Rita Choukeir looks forward to the three precious hours she gets with her young son in Lebanon, where child custody is awarded according to religious rulings.

Typically hailed as one of the region's most liberal countries, Lebanon's so-called personal status issues -- including marriage, divorce, and child custody -- are still determined by authorities of its 18 religious sects.

Shiite religious courts have ruled that divorced mothers must turn over custody of their sons when they reach two, and daughters aged seven, when custody goes de facto to the father.

But hundreds of mothers, including 24-year-old Choukeir, are fighting back. 

"As a mother, you have the biggest right to rebel, to take on the whole world to protect your son," said Choukeir, who has been fighting for custody of her four-year-old son Adam since her divorce in 2015. 

Her struggle is familiar and traumatic: Choukeir grew up seeing her own divorced mother just eight hours a week because of a ruling by a religious court.  

Barely holding back her tears, she told AFP: "I've seen the pain of both experiences: my own as a child raised far away from her mother, and a mother kept from her son."

Adam has been living with his father since shortly after the divorce, but Choukeir is now appealing to the country's top Shiite Muslim court for full custody.

- 'Not open for discussion' -Choukeir told AFP she was not expecting the court to rule in her favour, but that she would not stop fighting for custody "until the last of my days".

"I don't trust the (religious) court, I'm afraid of it," Choukeir said. 

"How can someone like me, who was deprived of her mother at three years old because of this court, trust it today?" 

According to Shiite scholars, the custody rule is an interpretation of the hadith (words and practices of the Prophet Mohammed) and the Koran, which stipulate that fathers are responsible for child-rearing. 

Ali Makki, who heads the religious court at Lebanon's Supreme Islamic Shiite Council, told AFP: "The Shiite sect relies primarily on interpretation, but the highest point of reference for the council is in Najaf," a Shiite shrine city in Iraq. 

"Amending the issue (of custody) is not easy for the Shiite sect."

A similar custody rule once applied to Lebanon's Sunni population, but after widespread pushback, clerics amended it and Sunni divorcees were granted full custody until their children turned 12.  

Now, Shiite mothers in Lebanon are waging their own protest campaign, with Choukeir's case as a rallying cry. 

On a recent Saturday afternoon, dozens of mothers gathered with their children at the Supreme Islamic Shiite Council headquarters in Beirut. 

Organised by the "Protecting Lebanese Women" campaign, protesters held banners that read, "Custody is a right for Rita and every mother!" 

"We have been waging this battle for four years without any positive response from the Supreme Islamic Shiite Council, which insists that this issue is not open for discussion," said campaign head Zeina Ibrahim.

- 'Stood my ground' -In some cases, divorcees offer to give up their alimony in exchange for full custody. But sometimes, Shiite women who resist lose their visitation rights, or are even jailed. 

In early November, Fatima Hamza, 32, spent six days behind bars after refusing to hand over her four-year-old son Ali to his father. 

The top Shiite court had ruled that since her son was older than two, full custody would be awarded to his father. 

"The court didn't even listen to me. Instead, they added to the injustice against me," she told AFP. 

While Hamza was imprisoned, Ali stayed with a relative and later returned to his mother's care -- although his father is still pressing the legal battle for full custody.  

"They renewed their demands that I be imprisoned again but I stood my ground. I told the judge that I was ready to go to jail again, but I would not implement this unjust and unfair decision," she said.

Surrounded by women outside the Shiite Council's headquarters, Hamza said Lebanese "mothers are becoming more daring after breaking down the walls of fear".

Last year, Darine Salman was jailed for 27 days when she refused to hand over custody of her six-year-old son to her Kuwaiti husband.

By the time she was released, Salman's husband had taken custody of their son. 

"The religious judge ruled in favour of the father, as expected. He refused to listen to me or let me defend myself," Salman, 36, told AFP.

"I don't want my rights. I just want to see my son." 

Comments 14
Missing patriot10 25 March 2017, 08:10

Ashraf lnas right?

Missing ArabDemocrat.com 25 March 2017, 17:31

Civil law anyone. Do we really need bronze age mindsets running our lives!

Thumb _mowaten_ 26 March 2017, 00:37

yes for civil law, it's needed across the board.

Thumb Elemental 25 March 2017, 08:39

See what you brought in Lebanon? Nice job.

Missing mohammad_ca 25 March 2017, 09:05

So we have an armed militia that follows orders from vilayet e faqih in Iran and a council who follows orders from Najaf How are these entities Lebanese ?

Thumb Elemental 25 March 2017, 22:58

Never were Lebanese to begin with.

Thumb _mowaten_ 26 March 2017, 00:29

lol that's rich, an israeli troll telling us what is lebanese and what isnt

Thumb _mowaten_ 26 March 2017, 00:31

what next, you're going to tell us hummus isn't lebanese? scumbo

Missing mohammad_ca 26 March 2017, 04:00

Mouwateh so getting orders from Najaf and Tahran doesn't put the Lebanese-ness of these entities into question ?

Thumb _mowaten_ 26 March 2017, 17:09

you think taking your orders from the US, israel, and saudi is better? plus in the article nobody mentioned tehran or even "taking orders". they are saying najaf is the point of reference for religious matters, same as the vatican is for catholics

Missing mohammad_ca 26 March 2017, 23:28

"The decision for our war, peace and all matters lies in the hand of vilayet e faqih" - nasrallaat

Thumb lubnani.masi7i 25 March 2017, 12:51

Ali Makki, who heads the religious court at Lebanon's Supreme Islamic Shiite Council, told AFP: "The Shiite sect relies primarily on interpretation, but the highest point of reference for the council is in Najaf," a Shiite shrine city in Iraq.

"Amending the issue (of custody) is not easy for the Shiite sect."

Thumb farsical.resistance 25 March 2017, 15:49

I am the first one to jump on the "Iranian terrorist militia's ideology is stuck in the stone ages" bandwagon but in cases like this one it would be grossly unfair to blame the Shiite religious courts only. It's the archaic concept of religious courts working in parallel with the civil courts that's to blame. The religious courts, all of them, should be done with when it comes to all civilian cases. They should concern themselves with religious matter and only ones related to their respective clergy. Any other legal matters should be dealt with in the civil court of law which, ideally, is supposed to treat everybody equally regardless of religion, gender or background. And if our esteemed religious leaders have a problem with that they can just hold their breath until they turn blue or till the second coming of Jesus, the Mahdi, the Messiah or whoever the Sunnis are waiting for.

Thumb shab 25 March 2017, 22:45

Shiite Lebanese Women ? Nope girls. The mothers are camouflaged as black waste bags